“Some days I call my sister and say, ‘Oh Edward, Edward’ and some days I say ‘Oh Jacob, oh Jacob.’” The woman said, pushing her glasses which were slipping back up on her nose. I looked at the baby in her lap and her five year-old playing nearby and I didn’t understand her at all.
This was a full grown woman in her early 30s who had a family and more importantly a husband. This was no girlish confession to a best friend, I had just met this woman at a moms group and she was gushing, simply gushing, on and on about Twilight.
“I’ve already asked my boss for the day off.” she said referring to the second movie’s opening day. “If he doesn’t give it to me I’ve already told my husband I’ll quit, I don’t care how much we need the money.” I squirmed in my seat not sure how to respond.
For the last two years or so I had felt really out of the loop. Many friends of mine had read the Twilight saga and obsessively so. Knowing how I couldn’t seem to put a good book down I had decided against picking them up despite having a big vampire Jones. A Jones which had me at the theater six times to watch Interview with a Vampire (when I was 15) and had seen my college years glued to Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
However, as I saw it I was no longer 15 nor in college. I had a busy household to run and no time for obsessions with Vampire sagas. My husband had read them out of boredom between jobs and after he was done I gave the books to the thrift shop to get them out of the house. I did read The Host, a non-saga written by Stephanie Meyers to get a feel for her writing style and to see what all the hype was about.
It was a pleasant enough read but I certainly wasn’t about to nominate her for any writing awards. What I did marvel at was her ability to keep you wanting to read more in a soap opera-like way. I knew I dare not touch the Twilight saga for fear of losing controlling of my life.
Like the moms group mom who was going on about her love for Jacob and Edward many of my fellow moms had expressed this level interest. Maybe I was missing something, I reasoned. Maybe I should watch the first movie, which was on DVD at the time. I went home and added it to my Netflix.
When it showed up a few days later I sat it on the self for a while, still not sure if I wanted to take the Twi-plunge. My hubby cracked jokes at me. Having read the books he knew how silly yet addictive they could be and he taunted me jovially about becoming one of the Twi-moms.
I screwed up my courage, popped it in the DVD and sat prepared to be dazzled. When it ended I was confused. That was it? I didn’t like it in the least. It was poorly acted, filled with halting cheesy dialogue, and the story itself unfolded like the worst romance novel - ever.
That’s Hollywood for you, I reckoned. Take what must be a decent book (based on its popularity) and what I assumed was a nice love story (based on Edwards female appeal) and crank it through the Hollywood machine and get a movie that left me thinking, “Uh, honey, you’re in a abusive relationship.”
“Nope.” My husband countered. The books are worse. “He’s even MORE of a stalker in the books.” Hummmmm…..So why then are women all over this country ignoring their kids, letting the house fall apart and emasculating their husbands via their Edward Cullen worship?
Now that the third movie is buzzing all around me, no matter how much I try and hide, I figured I would sit down and really research this thing. Really, what the heck is going on?
I found this article which calls the Twilight saga “emotional pornography.” From the article,
“Pornography is not simply about pictures. At its core, pornography starts with:
1. A desire to use people as self-gratification machines
2. A preference for man-made reality and man-made people over the real thing. “
This really hit the nail on the head for me over all the Twi-drama. Women were gorging their emotional lusts over Edward and Jacob but just like an airbrushed Playboy pinup - they aren’t real.
This “emotional” porn I think has the distinction of being potentially much more dangerous then traditional porn. Sever addictions aside, men may look at pornography and have a less satisfying sexual relationship because reality will never meet fantasy but men don’t tend to withdraw from their families in favor of porn the way women will emotionally withdraw from their husbands and family over their lust for Edward.
The reality is that the average mom’s life is nothing like Bella Swan’s and never can be, not because vampires aren’t real but because those moms are not 17 year old girls. They are grown women with children who need attention and husbands who need love and acceptance.
When a young girl obsesses over an unrealistic image no one suffers, it’s a harmless, hormonal induced distraction but when mom emotionally abandons her family as in this video her children and husband pay the price.
It disturbs me how openly women will flaunt their Edward or Jacob passion. A good wife speaks well of her husband in public. She represents him well and shows him honor and respect.
When did it become acceptable for grown, married women to openly fantasize over 17 year-old boys? How must their husbands feel when they do so? How would a woman feel if every man, including her husband, was suddenly emotionally and physically enamored with a teenage girl and spoke openly about this desire?
We would call it creepy, gross, and weird. It would make us uncomfortable just as millions of women in their 30s and 40s lining up at the theaters or bookstore, sporting their Edward Ts should make us equally as weary.
I wonder how many marriages are being pushed over the edge right now? How many women are searching, craving and filling their flesh, hearts and minds with thoughts of Edward at the expense of their husbands?
Being a good wife, mother and homemaker takes focus, joy, attention and a passion to be content with the wonderful family you have been given. Twilight seems to me a dangerous distraction from this divine calling.
