December 13th 2005
"Mommy! Mommy! Tookie's calling for help!" my friends son shouted as we readied the children to go to the vigil, two hours before Tookie's death. How do you explain this to the children? We tried but kept getting stuck, it just wasn't explianable.
The crowd was overwhelming. Nykki slept in his stroller the whole time. We held candles. It was dark. It was nosiey. Then at midnight a hush fell over the crowd. An odd silence as it seemed everyone there held their breath for a half hour. Because we had the children we were surrounded by cameras. Literally. Everyone 14 and over in our group was interviewed, everyone was photographed. Babies and puppies - they sell.
"You appear very emotional can you please tell us why?" the news reporter asked as he shoved a mic in my face. He looked like he was 18 years old. Polished and buffed like a doll. Suits, shoes, clothes and coats that could fund an inner city youth program for months. I forget what I said but I remember my voice was shaking.
At one point two men walked through the crowd yelling at us damn liberals and how people are dying on the streets every day - they were right. Where was our community when Tookie entered a life of crime? Where are we now as new 'thugs' are born everyday? What are we doing to help those children have a better life?
"Why don't you tell the truth!?" one British man yelled at the reporters "You can't get into the EU if you have the dealth penalty! The whole civilized world thinks you're barbaric! Tell the truth!"
"The state of California just murdered an innocent man! Why don't you report that?!" Another man yelled.
I'm still recovering emotionaly and physically. I still cry everyday but I would go again in a heart beat. I pray to Goddess I will never have to.
Movies to watch this weekend. Dead Man Walking, Shashank Redemption, Life of Daivd Gale.
And I ask myself, what can I do? How can I prevent murder both by people and the government??
Nykki and his good friend at a Save Tookie rally two years ago.
